My Bad, Folks. My Bad.

So I pretty much failed at my goal to post regularly on my blog. I'm feeling positive about my intentions and I almost posted a few times in the past few weeks. I couldn't seem to force myself to sit down and make it happen! Don't get me wrong, I did a lot of sitting down, typing, internet surfing, and reflection but none of those happened simultaneously enough to be represented as a blog post. So, my bad.

I am an official survivor of Medical School: Year One, Quarter One!!! Yeah that sounds like something silly to celebrate but it felt like a tremendous accomplishment after finals were over.

Finals. Something I completely underestimated. What seems to be my constant approach to medical school is that I underestimate it. I start thinking I am the bee's knees and I dominate all of my tests and then finals week comes along and humbles me. My poorest test performances were during finals week. I used to actually enjoy finals because I like the "big picture" stuff and that seemed to be the theme of comprehensive finals.

Example: Undergrad Finals week was similar to if you read a book and took a test on what that book was about. What were the general ideas? What was important to learn in that book that will prepare you for the next book in the series? Those sort of tests were nice because I could answer them confidently, knowing that I had the big picture by then.

Example: Medical School Finals Week was as if I had read the book and they wanted to know what happened on page 16 and how that related to paragraph 7 of pg 708. It was terrifying! I felt very under-prepared for my first final. I passed just fine and got an A in the class but I was doomed to study non-stop for the rest of the week. I stopped thinking that it was going to compare to the undergrad tests that I so dearly loved. So I pulled a few almost-nighters and one all-nighter and got straight A's for my first quarter! Work was the only defense I had against the tests that so brutally mistreated all of my classmates and me. I had never heard so many people talking after the tests with so much surprise at the difficulty and detail of the tests. At least I wasn't the only one doing the underestimating!

I have been consistently studying with two guys from my ward. Rob Root and Christian Anderson, both from St. George, Utah. Rob is one of those lucky people that can use a large percent of their brain to remember everything they read, see, smell, and taste and can then synthesize and analyze all of the data then write a 40 page essay on how it all relates to everything I don't know. In short, he is my pick for the spot at the top of the class after the first two years. It is nice to study with the genius kid. Christian and I just sit back and let the professor explain the hard stuff while I come up with ways that a kindergarten teacher would explain it and then I'm good to take the test!

On why testing methods and content seem to be somewhat impractical and overly detailed, Rob has a great theory. If they were to test us on the most practical application of the material presented in class, everyone would get 100%. If they just tested us on general ideas, and essential knowledge, everyone would be getting such high scores that no comparisons between students could be made. Then the light bulb goes on. So medical school is a new filter system on our paths to becoming physicians! Many have thought, as I have, that the filters would stop after undergrad and MCATs and personal essays and interviews. But nay! The filtration continues! But medical school filtering is much more subtle in that you only have to pass to become a doctor. Some second years have taken the phrase "Seven Oh, Dee Oh" meaning a 70% means you will still become a D.O.. I am way too obsessive and competitive to be happy with 70 so I will continue to play the intense, sleep deprived game of getting 90's on the ridiculously difficult tests.

My new question is this: When does the filtering stop!? Does it stop in Rotations? Does it stop in Residency? Will it stop sometime during my career? Have I chosen a profession that dooms me to a lifetime of weeding-out?? I wonder...

After the dust settled on Friday last week, and after I slept for two days, I have been on vacation! I have never been so thankful for Pilgrims or Native Americans or turkey in my entire life! The headaches are gone and my eyes aren't bloodshot anymore! I'm excited to head back to school (disturbing, I know) but this week of hanging out with my girls and relaxing (recuperating) has been totally awesome. I'll be better about posting next quarter. I promise!!!